


sense of home

by ttlmtbee



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: 2019 Era (Phandom), Christmas, Ficlet, Introspection, M/M, im just emo okay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-24
Updated: 2019-12-24
Packaged: 2021-02-26 06:34:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 600
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21929041
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ttlmtbee/pseuds/ttlmtbee
Summary: Dan and Phil spend Christmas together for the first time.
Relationships: Dan Howell/Phil Lester
Comments: 8
Kudos: 53





	sense of home

**Author's Note:**

> so i wrote this today on a whim cause i was emo about the christmas clips and this is what happens when i have emotions. merry christmas!

It’s weird, waking up together on Christmas morning for the first time. Weird not being woken up by an excited video call from Phil at eight a.m. Weird being in their bedroom on the Isle of Man instead of alone in Wokingham. Weird relaxing in bed, wearing matching pyjamas that Kath had picked out for the whole Lester clan, next to the love of his life instead of wishing to be closer.

Despite his age, Phil is like a kid on Christmas morning. Sitting on the floor of the living room, the two of them leaning against the sofa, Phil eagerly passes the presents around to his family. Dan’s never seen him like this – fully in his element, surrounded by the people he loves, making everyone laugh. Never seen him smile quite as wide as when he looks over at Dan, and realizes he’s sitting next to him instead of on the other side of the country. Realizing that they will never have to celebrate Christmas separately again.

He can tell the rest of the Lesters see it too, and that they are also happy to have Dan there with them. Kath and Nigel have made him feel like part of the family since that first trip in 2009, Martyn is happy to not be the only one Phil can annoy for once. Cornelia, the other curly-haired counterpart, happy to have someone to joke with about the strange Lester traditions.

Phil had offered to spend Christmas in the South with Dan’s family. The idea of being able to be out and proud with his boyfriend of ten years at the Howell Christmas dinner felt like a dream. Feeling like he belonged in his childhood home, not lying anymore, it didn’t seem real. The past year had been a whirlwind, reintroducing Phil to his family as his boyfriend, reconnecting with Adrian, becoming closer with his grandma after years of distance – things he didn’t think were possible. For the first time in a very long time, Dan felt like he could be at home with his family. Still, Dan insisted they spend the week with the Lester’s. He didn’t want to rush things with his family, and it felt only right to spend their first Christmas together where it all started. They would have plenty of Christmases to spend with the Howell’s.

Dan imagined a time when they could host their own Christmas, in the ‘forever home’. A place big enough for both their families to stay. Dan would try his best to make a turkey dinner, with vegan options for Adrian and all the deserts for Phil. He knows their mums would probably take over. They would have a giant tree, with white lights and the same ornaments they’ve had for years. Maybe there’d be a dog. Maybe one day, far in the future, there’d be kids. He imagined Martyn and Cornelia as the best aunt and uncle. A home of their own, with everything they loved in one spot.

Now, sat at the dining room table at Kath and Nigel’s, everything felt right. Dan filmed an Instagram story of Phil rolling the dice in the game they were playing. Dan wanted their audience to be there too, in little ways.

After ten years of “see you when we get back” and train journeys from opposite directions on Boxing Day, Dan doesn’t want this moment to end. Falling asleep that evening, breathing in the scent of Phil mixed with pine trees and winter. Hearing Cornelia’s musical laugh from the kitchen. Phil’s dad’s acquired northern accent bellowing through the house. Home.

**Author's Note:**

> follow me @ttlmt on tumblr!


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